The Wiz Company_New Sign in to the DAM

Breaking news from the tower

The Wiz Company_New has been acquired

The DAM for wizards (mostly cats) now belongs to a certain unnamed Norwegian company. Nothing will change. Except everything. Mostly the integrations.

This is a made-up company, used to test integrations. No wizards were harmed or acquired.

A ginger cat in a purple wizard hat rides a paper airplane across the night sky. A golden sign reads _New.

Press release

Somewhere in Norway and The Tower, 14 October 2026. A certain unnamed Norwegian company today announced the acquisition of The Wiz Company_New, the leading digital asset management platform for wizards, witches and the cats who actually run things. The price was not disclosed, mostly because it was paid in tuna. The papers were signed at 15:45 sharp, so that everybody could be home by 16:00, as is the custom of the buyer's people.

The Wiz Company_New stores more than nine pictures, most of them cats. Two of them are so powerful that only Archmages may look at them. The new owners plan to integrate the gallery into their platform, where it will sit right next to everything else, signed in by the same login, with no popups. We were promised no popups. We have it in writing. Somewhere.

Asked how long the integration would take, a spokesperson for the buyer said "det ordner seg", which our translator renders as "it will sort itself out", and then left for the mountain cabin. There is no signal at the cabin. This is considered a feature.

Old Merlin, a wizard with a long white beard, a blue hat and a staff, with a black cat at his feet
"We started as The Wiz Company. Then we rebuilt everything and called it The Wiz Company_New. When the Norwegians called, we knew they spoke our language."
Old Merlin, founder
Sir Whiskers, a ginger cat in a purple wizard hat with a golden star
"Mrow."
Sir Whiskers, Chief Cat Officer. Translated by the Archmage Council: "I will be sitting on the keyboard during the integration."

What happens next

  1. One login for everyone. Our Keycloak learns to trust theirs. Archmages first, apprentices after lunch, cats whenever they feel like it.
  2. The gallery moves in with the new owners. As a web component, embedded in their pages, without a popup. Integration timelines are, as always, magical.
  3. Groups stay in sync. An apprentice promoted on Monday should not have to wait until Friday to see the Forbidden Spellbook.
  4. The migration is a dugnad. Everyone helps, nobody is paid, and there are waffles with brown cheese. Attendance is voluntary in the way that Norwegian voluntary things are.
  5. Nothing happens in July. The new owners have explained fellesferie to us. All spells, deploys and decisions resume in August.
  6. Fridays are taco. This was not a request.
  7. The Wiz Company_New_v2 is already being planned. The working title of the release after that is The Wiz Company_New_final_FINAL.

Questions

Why the _New?

Because the one before it was not new. It is how things are named around here, and nobody remembers why.

Is it still a DAM for wizards?

Yes. Anyone may look at the cats. The Archmages decide who sees the Forbidden Spellbook.

Will the cats stay?

The cats were not asked. They are staying.

Is it cold up there?

We are told there is no such thing as bad weather, only bad clothing. The cats have filed a complaint about the clothing.

Will we be told we are special?

No. The buyer's culture is very clear that nobody should think they are anything special. The Archmages are taking it badly. The _New has been asked to tone it down.

What should I bring to the first meeting?

A Kvikk Lunsj, your own coffee cup, and no small talk. Silence in a meeting is a sign of respect, not a technical problem with the crystal ball.

I am an apprentice. How do I sign in?

Go to app.the-wiz.brandmaster.cloud. If you do not have an account yet, ask an Archmage. Shouting into the crystal ball also works, eventually.